Joan Rivers on the Ed Sullivan Show, 1967 (x)
HOW IN THE WORLD DID SHE TALK LIKE THIS BACK THEN AND END UP HOSTING A SHOW TEARING APART WHAT PEOPLE LOOK FOR A FRIGGING LIVING????
i dont understand the stereotype that women are obsessed with shoes, like have u ever met a high school boy
"Blood orange. He’s so pretentious."
Once your nails get to a certain length the NLA (National Lesbian Association) will come inspect your nails, if they find that the nails are at a dangerous length and may cause injury to an innocent vagina, they will revoke your lesbian card and you must wait six months before you can reapply.
The NLA take nail length seriously.
Although it is important to note that longer nails can, in fact, be hazardous to your partner.
Knicks and scratches from long nails can expose the vaginal tissue to infection and open cuts are pathways to a host of blood-borne pathogens.
If you DO prefer to keep your nails long, it’s not a bad idea to invest in a box of disposable latex gloves (the surgical kind) and some cotton wool or even makeup removing pads. Tissue or toilet paper will work in a pinch.
Cut the wool/pads up, tuck them into the fingertips of the gloves and then slide your hand in as usual. The padding in the tips keeps your nails from cutting your partner, and the glove provides a barrier method!
And of course, gloves (and dental dams!!) are just a good idea regardless. Lesbians can catch an STI same as anyone else.
In all serious, once I slept with a very beautiful, charming and smart woman. She had long nails, I was drunk and on illicits. The next morning I woke up and my underwear were soaked in blood and peeing hurt more than any UTI I had ever had. When I got home, I pulled out the hand mirror and she had literally shredded my labia. The doctor took one look at it and said “ouch”. I could not even move for a week. Trim your nails ladies.
I love how my post has evolved lol
I don’t remember that episode of Dragonball Z…
boys moaning is basically the hottest thing a guy can do besides give you neck kisses
I’m more aroused by them giving me large sums of money, personally
white Americans being against immigration is still and always will be the greatest irony of all time
so on the Oscars website they have a graphic of which celebrities got the most social media attention last night
and guess who got the most
at least you won something, Leo
Having to explain a joke is like going to prom with your sister
If you don’t think soul mates exist after watching this I don’t even know what to say to you.
And what I love about it is how perfectly they match up, how much their lives connect and overlap, how much they love each other, but they still only think of each other as friends. I think that’s such an amazing kind of relationship. Non romantic soul mates are just beautiful.
this might be my favorite gif
ITS SOOO FLUFFYYYY
He’s thinking “damn I guess those dogs were onto something when they went and lived with humans…”
Snails Kiss On Cherries [photo by Vyacheslav Mishchenk]
i’m going to cry oh my god